
That
feeling of dressing for a party ... always accompanied by a slightly sinking
heart and major attacks of stress and anxiety. For me, it started when I was
about three and has never quite left. I love choosing what to wear for everyday
life - I adore clothes but find dressing up really difficult.
It was
always that way. One never felt quite right at the party and those given for
small children at the time were never exactly relaxed; a formal tea table,
peculiar food [margarine spread sliced bread with hundreds & thousands
anyone?], some alien form of entertainment presided over by a resting actor,
and competitive games involving never, ever, being the one to land on a chair
as they were removed one by one. Exclusion! Alienation! Failure to sparkle! The
other big factor: my generation didn't get much of a say in how they wanted to
dress. Personally, I would have given ANYTHING for something frou frou &
preferably pink. My mother, with exquisite taste, ignored me and favoured plain
white silk dresses worn with black patent shoes. It probably looked really
sweet but Oh, how I longed for frilly full skirts! Oh to be the FAIRY PRINCESS
girl just once!


